Jeff's dad talking shit about him is still the single best AD joke I've seen
>I'm so proud of my son. In fact, this is the wall where I keep all his awards.
>What? There's nothing there! Oh my God! They've been stolen! I better call the sheriff!
>We're gonna get to the bottom of this! It's ringing... Hello, Sheriff Perkins? Henry Fischer. Yes, yes, father of the illustrious Jeff Fischer. Someone has stolen all his awards. All of them! Must have been several strong men with a huge truck. What? What do you mean, Jeff's never won an award in his entire life? But if that were true, that would mean my son is a worthless piece of crap who never accomplished anything! Well, sir, I'm not gonna sit here while you say those awful things about my pride and joy!
>I promise you, son: I will not rest until I get every single ribbon, trophy and letter of commendation back on that wall!
>I'm gonna go down to the bar, round up a posse. We'll get Charlie's dogs, close off the perimeter! You just sit there and keep on making me proud.
>I need something for Charlie's dogs so they can pick up the scent. Do you have your high school diploma? No? They got that too?