>>19767840>I really would die if it meant being with her
Yeah, that's the impression I got. The anon that said astral projection was right, but you'll need to be able to open your mind for that (or for any form of contact, really), and it might be a long time before you can come to terms with this.
If you do get good at astral projection, hopefully you'll understand when you first project why you don't need to both be dead to see each other. But the dead are not like the living, so she'll probably have a full appreciation for just how much being with her in the astral plane will ruin your life if you let it. Only you can make it healthy for you to see her again.
A body is a precious thing, and time doesn't exist on the astral. No matter what happens, you should expect that your next meeting in this life will be to say goodbye.