shadow isnt the meme you are taught. this implies that there is a "bad" human nature and a "good" human nature, when there is just human nature. your choices will reflect your reality and where your life goes next.
all of these energies have merit in the appropriate environment
consensual playful environments, for example, are one way to go
another is being cognizant of what "the environment" is open to or is against, and applying the appropriate energy
"shadow" really just means the inversion of self, hence shadow. it is not a "darkness" inherently, it is the part of yourself that is opposite who you are now. an inversion
if you are soft, it means becoming rigid
if you are angry, it means becoming tranquil
if you are hateful, it means becoming loving
the point is that the repressed parts of yourself get a stage to express their energy rather than bottling up, exploding at some point or causing depression.
most of what we view as bad is downstream from societal expectation
you can learn to point these energies in appropriate directions