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Sixpack: Team leader, whose special ability is grotesque drunkenness and beating villains with broken-off liquor bottles.
Bueno Excellente: An obese, sweaty, and bald Latino in an overcoat who "defeats evil with the power of perversion." Generally, the only thing he says is "Bueno", often preceded by a creepy chuckle.
The Defenestrator: A large, burly man in a denim jacket, black sunglasses, with black hair who obsessively carries around a window through which he forcefully throws criminals and the occasional unlucky policeman. His assaults on police officers landed him in Arkham Asylum. His appearance, name, and much of his dialogue are direct parodies of Arnold Schwarzenegger's character in Terminator 2: Judgment Day.
Dogwelder: A thin, silent man in a welder's mask who spot welds dead canines to evildoers.
Friendly Fire: A large, hapless man in a red cowl, Friendly Fire would easily be the most powerful of Section 8's heroes if he were to shoot anything other than allies with the potent bolts of energy he fires from his hands.
Jean de Baton-Baton: A bizarrely gaunt walking French caricature who defeats enemies with "the power of Frenchness," as expressed by savage beatings with a baguette and occasionally blinding others with rings of garlic and onions.
Flemgem: A sickly, thin, bald man in a green suit and a purple domino mask who has the ability to produce and expel large volumes of phlegm, which can blind, suffocate, or simply disgust evildoers.
Shakes: A thin, hairy vagrant who upsets people through stutters and an overall shaking palsy. He is a frequent, accidental target of Friendly Fire.
