An Imperial Guardsman gets a Sister of Cleaning alone in a corner
Guard: "Hey Sister. I know this isn't standard protocol, and it might get me in trouble but... you just seem like somebody I can trust."
Sister: "Of course you can trust me. I'd never tell anybody anything you told me... or did to m-"
Guard: "I just can't hold it in any more. Sister... do you want to see my cock?"
The sister's heart is beating hard, she starts getting wet with excitement
Sister: "Ye... yes! I'd love to see it. C-can I touch it too?"
Guard: "Oh, you can stay up all night petting it if you want. We can't do it here though. Follow me to my room."
The sister follows him, literally shaking with excitement, tears of joy forming in her eyes
The guard opens the room and walks to a small cube of metal mesh in the corner of the room and removes a chicken from it
Guard: "His name is Sergeant Clucky! I raised him all the way up from an egg I got from a local farm! Isn't he precious? Go on, pet him!"
The next day the guard was flogged for harboring a live animal. The Commissar found out through an anonymous tip.