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Anonymous Sun 15 Dec 12:01:06 2013 No.28876069 View View Reply Original Report

Quoted By: >>28876302 >>28877070

/tg/

I've been invited to a Pathfinder game.

I don't play this game often but I feel obliged to try to play a member reminiscent of a Wu-Tang Clan member.

He doesn't have to be Bard-centric, just needs to have a emphasis on hip-hop and a fascination with foriegn weaponry despite being a negro.

How should I do this?

Anonymous Sun 15 Dec 2013 12:23:21 No.28876265 Report

Quoted By:

Take a level of Ninja or Monk.

Anonymous Sun 15 Dec 2013 12:28:27 No.28876302 Report

Quoted By: >>28876350

>>28876069
Go full ninja, make him black, and have Preform(Rappin) and Preform(Beat boxing) as ranked skills.

Make sure you also put points into knowledge(local), but scratch out the name and write down "Streetwise"

Anonymous Sun 15 Dec 2013 12:36:52 No.28876350 Report

Quoted By:

>>28876302
Knowledge: The Hood

Book V: WU-TANG VERSUS THE GOLDEN PHOENIX Sun 15 Dec 2013 12:41:22 No.28876384 Report

Quoted By: >>28876424 >>28877070 >>28880745 >>28882715

- In the fourth month of the first year of the reign of the Hongguang Emperor came the barbarian invaders to Hubei. Their army swarmed like ants over the surface of the land, and they inflicted ten thousand injuries and indignities upon the common people. They were filled with desire, and with longing for things that were not and could never be, and they knew not the joy of emptiness and the unconscious. So they caused things to be done that should not have been done. The Wu-Tang Clan resolved to destroy the barbarian general, and remove the scourge from the land. But the barbarian general was guarded by a warrior of fierce and unnatural power, named the Golden Phoenix. So the Nine Masters of the Wu-Tang Clan trekked to the Citadel of Thunder and Lightning, where the Golden Phoenix dwelled with ten thousand soldiers, and began the ferocious attack. They fell upon the barbarians with perfected martiality, destroying the foes without mercy.

Ri Za said, “Let us bring the raucous noise of war to the enemy!”

Inspector of the Deck said, “The Wu-Tang Clan is not a thing to be trifled with!”

The Nine Masters fought on. Ghost-Face Killer saw that Rui Kong was about to be attacked from behind by a host of the foe.

Then Ghost-Face Killer said, “Rui Kong! On guard! You had better protect your neck!”

So Rui Kong turned and slew the enemy with contemptuous ease. Then he said, “Shame on a barbarian for this cowardly action!”

During the battle the Wu-Tang Clan displayed no effort and took no conscious actions, in accordance with the Dao. Thus nothing was left undone. The Nine Masters vanquished the legion of foes, and arrived in a vast circular room, with ten thousand doors and ten thousand windows. You-God said, “This room is the Seventh Chamber. Inside we will find the Golden Phoenix.” So the Nine Masters entered.

Book V: WU-TANG VERSUS THE GOLDEN PHOENIX Sun 15 Dec 2013 12:42:23 No.28876393 Report

Quoted By: >>28876424 >>28877070

Inside they found the Golden Phoenix. He stroked his mustache, and preened and strutted. Then he said, “There are nine of you, and I am but one. Which of you shall fight me honorably in chess-fighting?”

Then the Old Dirty Bastard gave a shout, for his skill in the mysteries of chess-fighting was renowned. “My style is unbreakable! Prepare to be defeated most ignominiously,” he said.

So the warriors sat above the chessboard, and moved the pieces to and fro. After the sand had left the glass, they engaged in honorable combat, before returning to the chess match. But the Golden Phoenix was sly and treacherous. During the clash of minds, he furtively removed a knife, and attempted a quick strike.

The Old Dirty Bastard blocked the blow. Then he laughed. “Ha! I am the Old Dirty Bastard, alive and uncut!” Then he dealt the Golden Phoenix a mighty blow, stunning him, and the Nine Masters bound the foe and stood around him to render a final verdict.

Master Killer said, “It is not the Wu-Tang Clan who sits in judgment of you, Golden Phoenix. We have gone forth, to the towns and villages, and have done a survey of the common people, who have decided how you shall answer for your crimes.”

The Golden Phoenix sneered, again. “What do I care for the Han people?” So said he with contempt in his serpent’s voice.

Then Method Man gave a shout. “And the survey says - you are dead!” So he chopped off the Golden Phoenix’s head. Thus ended the battle.

Excerpted from “THE STORY OF THE GLORIOUS SWORD OF THE WU-TANG CLAN,” by Gao Feiyang Sun 15 Dec 2013 12:43:28 No.28876398 Report

Quoted By: >>28876424 >>28877070

- The Old Dirty Bastard said, “The Jurchen barbarians have not yet been driven from all-under-Heaven. Thus it is our duty to make them feel endless pain.” So the Old Dirty Bastard and his acolytes set forth. They included the Young Dirty Bastard, the Fat Dirty Bastard, the Tall Dirty Bastard, the Lame Dirty Bastard, the Unlucky Dirty Bastard, the Laughing Dirty Bastard, and the Lecherous Dirty Bastard. They marched for a thousand li, until they came upon a vast barbarian encampment, in which there were not less than ten thousand men. Shouting a fearsome war-cry, the Old Dirty Bastard led his acolytes into the midst of the barbarian foe.

The glorious battle commenced. The barbarian invaders were weak, and cowardly, and did not possess the spirit of martial valor, so they shrieked and fled before the mighty onslaught of the Wu-Tang Clan and their Shaolin style. The Old Dirty Bastard strode up to the barbarian commander and said, “I challenge you to honorable combat! May the Glorious Sword of the Wu-Tang strike a blow to your entrails!” The foul fiend hissed menacingly and attacked. The Old Dirty Bastard drove him back with consummate skill and valor. Yet just as he was preparing to deliver the killing blow, he was stabbed in the back by a cowardly barbarian wielding a poisoned blade. Even in his agony, the Old Dirty Bastard defeated the foe.

Excerpted from “THE STORY OF THE GLORIOUS SWORD OF THE WU-TANG CLAN,” by Gao Feiyang Sun 15 Dec 2013 12:44:30 No.28876403 Report

Quoted By: >>28876424 >>28877070

After the battle, the Old Dirty Bastard’s acolytes gathered round him on the field, soaked with the blood of the vanquished enemy. The Lame Dirty Bastard said, “Glorious Sage Old Dirty Bastard, grant us some words of wisdom to live by.”

The Old Dirty Bastard sat up weakly and coughed out a mouthful of blood. He said, “Protect your neck.” Then he died. Upon hearing the ill news, Great Sage Ri Za was greatly distraught. He summoned twelve beat-boxers to his chambers and began a free-style spoken poem-song in the memory of his fallen comrade:

"I picked him up, then I held him by his head
His eyes shut, that is when I knew he was -
Aiya! How do I say goodbye?
It is always the good ones that have to die
Memories in the corner of my mind
Flashbacks, I was laughing all the time
I taught him all about the Dao and the world
But I wish I had a chance to say these few words
After laughter, comes tears"

So perished the Old Dirty Bastard.

Anonymous Sun 15 Dec 2013 12:48:06 No.28876424 Report

Quoted By: >>28876473 >>28876483

>>28876384
>>28876393
>>28876398
>>28876403

Wow.

You are amazing.

Anonymous Sun 15 Dec 2013 12:55:17 No.28876473 Report

Quoted By:

>>28876424
Anyone Archiving this brilliance?

Anonymous Sun 15 Dec 2013 12:56:21 No.28876483 Report

Quoted By: >>28877044

>>28876424
I've just posted someone else's work, but I do think the concept is better if you can put a hint of seriousness in it. Play a black dude from Tian Xia, probably a Ninja as Samurai and Monk are not great (Samurai is workable though) and try to work in as many references as possible while retaining a veneer of plausibility. A Bard would also be fine, go Arcane Duelist or Dervish perhaps.

Because seriously, you should be able to work in the, "Alive and uncut!" line and that is amazing. Old Dirty Bastard is a great character name too.

Anonymous Sun 15 Dec 2013 14:04:51 No.28877044 Report

Quoted By:

>>28876483
Dawnflover Dervish (you don't have to be dex based, although you can be if you want) can Dervish dance with ANY performance. You could make it Perform: Hip-hop and it'd still work.

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Anonymous Sun 15 Dec 2013 14:07:09 No.28877070 Report

Quoted By:

>>28876069

>Masta Killa's verse on Da Mytery of Chess Boxin'

Godlike.

>>28876384
>>28876393
>>28876398
>>28876403

As is this.

Anonymous Sun 15 Dec 2013 19:23:13 No.28880745 Report

Quoted By:

>>28876384
I sorta wanna do a campaign with all black disciples of the "Wu-Tang Clan" now.

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Anonymous Sun 15 Dec 2013 21:40:03 No.28882715 Report

Quoted By:

>>28876384
>So Rui Kong turned and slew the enemy with contemptuous ease. Then he said, “Shame on a barbarian for this cowardly action!”
Oh shit

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