At this office I worked at, I was unfortunate enough to have a front row seat of the corridor of the toilets for a few months before I got an office.
The funniest thing I ever saw was this little Paki engineer from another department come tearing around the corner at the opposite end from me, clutching his arse, stomach and making faces best described as HNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGNNNNGGG!
He's not going to make it
But he will make it to the handicapped toilet, so he lays his shoulder into the door and there's a clattering of the seat.
>Well done bro
Some 20-30min later he staggers out, sweating like a pig with a much relieved look on his face just as one of our accountants comes around the corner, pegging it along on his crutches in a hurry.
Don't like the guy, sure, he's a cripple, but he's an angry cripple that's hard to deal with that made my reporting girl cry once and in this case, he's an angry cripple in need of a shit.
He gives the engineer an angry look on the way past coming out of the handicapped shitter.
>This will be good
He flings open the door with a crutch
A mix of curry, rotten meat and beans punches him in the face, to the point he gags
Then he falls over trying to simultaneously swear, vomit and avoid shitting himself at the same time.
"FUCKENCUUUUN RAAAALLGGGG NT, FILTHY NIGG AAAAARRRROOOGH"
>Pretend to work
It was at the point he shat himself, that I also lost my shit and had to duck down under the desk, pretending to pick something up and biting my thumb so hard that I cried.